Speaking the Truth With Disdai

As a Christian who claimed to “love my enemies,” I hadn’t lived, thought or acted like one when it came to my political engagement. Rather than speaking the truth in love — a central tenet of my faith — I spoke the truth in disdain towards those I disagreed with. In my heart, I had an “ends justify means” attitude — deluding myself into thinking that being truthful was the most loving thing I could do. But scripture is crystal clear on what love actually means, as anyone who’s attended a wedding knows:

 

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.” (1 Corinthians 13:4-5)

As sincere as I was in my pursuit of a better America, I was sincerely wrong in how I went about it. Instead of setting a better tone, I adapted to what I saw being modeled by those around me.

First, to humble myself by seeking to understand why people think differently than me. Nobody’s story is one and the same. By asking questions of those we disagree with, we can better understand our neighbors and learn something about ourselves. Doing so exposes our blind spots and helps expand our perspectives. Our opinions may not end up where others’ are, but we can better appreciate how and why they got there. As a result, the contempt we so often feel towards those we disagree with gives way to compassion.

 

Second, to neither offend nor take offense. Even the Bible admits that this one’s hard; scripture tells us that offense is inevitable, “but woe unto those through whom offense comes!” We all say offensive things at times, but doing our best not to offend in return is an important life skill, both in and outside of the political arena. Moreover, learning to forgive — another tenet central to the Christian faith — is part of becoming a healthy and happy human.

 

Third, to engage with love. As Martin Luther King Jr. said, “Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that,” which reminds me of the Apostle Paul’s admonition to “not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” What use is talk about loving our country if we hate half the people who live in it? Love must be the motivating factor of everything we do in politics; without it, we are blinded by selfish ambition and a zero-sum mentality, which naturally fuels hatred for those we disagree with.